ANXEITY

Seperation and Anxeity for parents and young children aged 3years



Seperation and Anxeity for parents and young children aged 3years

Normal anxiety and fear tends to follow a developmental sequence. These tendencies seem to be hard-wired and seem to have a developmental purpose. Infants commonly show a fearful response to loud noise or the sudden loss of physical support. Reluctance to be separated from one's caregiver is a normal, healthy response in young children and indicated the development of healthy attachment. When a child starts to walk on its own, fear of strange animals is an adaptive response. Performance anxiety can appear in late childhood and social phobia in adolescence. Some degree of separation anxiety is a sign that the preschooler has developed healthy attachments to loved ones. In many cases, it stops within 3-4 minutes after the parent leaves.

What is separation anxiety?

Separation anxiety is a normal developmental stage experienced by a child when separated from the primary caregiver(Palmer, 2007, 53-65). It typically manifests itself as crying and distress when a child is away from a parent or from home.

As time goes by and a child learns to feel safe in a new environment and secure that a parent or caregiver will return after an absence, anxiety over separation should fade.

The typical sequence of child development and parent/child attachment is as follows:

* First few months: Babies don't differentiate much among caregivers and usually can be calmed by any loving person, regardless of relationship. This is why new parents often get more emotional the first time they leave an infant with a babysitter or at day care than the baby does!

* 7-14 months: By about 7 months, babies realize that there's only one Mommy and/or Daddy, but they don't have a sense of time, so even if parents step into the next room for a minute, all the baby knows is that they're gone — maybe forever! — And they're going to cry or cling or do whatever it takes to keep that from happening. This phase is often called “stranger anxiety,” (Cooley, 2006, 603-605) because even the happiest child becomes shy or fearful around everyone but the primary caregiver, and generally peaks before 18 months.

* Toddler/preschool years: Children can be anxious and become emotional when a parent or primary caregiver leaves but can be distracted by activities with the caregiver or other children.

* By age 5: Most children are secure enough to be left with a babysitter or dropped off at school without distress.

When feeling anxious about separation, young children exhibit many different behaviors, including:

* Crying or whining

* Clinginess (holding hand or leg, wanting to be held, hiding behind parent)

* Shyness

* Silence (instead of constant talking or babble)

* Unwillingness to interact with others, even if they are familiar (other parent, grandparent, friend)

Situations such as moving to a new home, a change in caregiver, or the birth of a new sibling can trigger or exacerbate separation ...