Running Head:PARENT CHILD RELATIONSHIP

Parent Child Relationship

Parent Child Relationship

Divorce is an intensely stressful experience for all children, regardless of age or developmental level; many children are inadequately prepared for the impending divorce by their parents. This studyfound that less than 10% of children had support from adults other than relatives during the acute phase of the divorce.  This research reveals that “children with positive attributes such as attractiveness, easy temperament, and social competence are also more resilient following their parents' divorce” and that the harmful effects of divorce seems to be lessening as divorce becomes more common.

   The pain experienced by children at the beginning of a divorce is composed of: a sense of vulnerability as the family disintegrates, a grief reaction to the loss of the intact family (many children do not realize their parents' marriage is troubled), loss of the non-custodial parent, a feeling of intense anger as the disruption of the family, and strong feelings of powerlessness. 

Unlike bereavement or other stressful events, it is almost unique to divorcing families that as children experience the onset of this life change, usual and customary support systems tend to dissolve, though the ignorance or unwillingness of adults to actively seek out this support for children. 

Developmental Considerations in the Response of Children A major focus of the scholarly literature on divorce is the grouping of common reactions of children by age groups.

The children are likely to exhibit a regression of the most recent developmental milestone achieved. Additionally, sleep disturbances and an exacerbated fear of separation from the custodial parent are common. There is usually a great deal of Early latency.

These children will often openly grieve for the departed parent. There is a noted preoccupation with fantasies that distinguishes the reactions of this age group. Children have replacement fantasies, or fantasies that their parents will happily reunite in the not-so-distant future. Children in this developmental stage have an especially difficult time with the concept of the permanence of the divorce.

Anger and a feeling of powerlessness are the predominate emotional response in this age group. Like the other developmental stages, these children experience a grief reaction to the loss of their previously intact family. There is a greater tendency to label a 'good' parent and a 'bad' parent and these children are very susceptible to attempting to take care of a parent at the expense of their own needs. 

Adolescents are prone to responding to their parent's divorce with acute depression, suicidal ideation, and sometimes violent acting out episodes. These children tend to focus on the moral issues surrounding divorce and will often judge their parents' decisions and actions. Many adolescents become anxious and fearful about their own future love and marital relationships. However, this age group has the capability to perceive integrity in the post-divorce relationship of their parents and to show compassion for their parents without neglecting their own needs.

Effects of Divorce on the Parent-Child Relationship

Diminished parenting: In the wake of a divorce, most custodial mothers exhibit ...