The 5 Lasting Rules of Negotiations

The 5 Lasting Rules of Negotiations

Introduction

Negotiation is a process whereby two persons or groups strive to reach agreement on issues or courses of action where there is some degree of difference in interest, goals, values or beliefs. The job of the negotiator is to build credibility with the "other side," find some common ground (shared interests), learn the opposing position, and share information that will persuade the "other side" to agree to an outcome. One element of common ground advantageous to a negotiator is a common culture. Those belonging to a culture (team, family, military organization, race, nation, religion, etc.), have common values, beliefs and goals(Donaldson, 1996). We consider them to be on the "same sheet of music." Members of groups such as this have shared expectations that reduce conflict and facilitate collective effort. These cultural "norms" evolve from the storming and norming phases in the life of a group. Thus, the process used to arrive at these norms is a bargaining process- negotiation. Negotiation is different from arbitration and other forms of decision making. Unlike an arbitrator, a mediator or an adjudicator, the power to determine the facts, define the process and to make the decision in negotiations rests with the participants, not with a third party. In adjudication processes the objective is to create doubt in a third party's mind (judge, arbitrator) about the "facts" presented by the opposite side, with the goal of winning. In negotiations there is no third party; the party you must convince is your opponent: (Gates, 2011)

Lasting Rules

1. Don't Bargain Over Positions

Most of us begin negotiation by identifying a position and arguing for it, such as: “I want to retain the CEO title.” But such positional bargaining can limit your ability to arrive at a “wise agreement” that benefits both parties — the proverbial middle ground and the whole purpose of negotiation. Instead of thinking of a “position,” identify the goal. You want remuneration for the sweat you put into your company. You want, for example, status (to remain CEO). But a specific position is binary — you either get it or you don't. A goal can be attained in many ways, giving you many more options for arriving at a solution. (Lewicki, 2001)

2. Separate the People From the Problem

Most negotiation is emotional. You want something, after all. And emotion clouds our objectivity. But you can limit the emotional content of your negotiation by thinking of the person you're talking to as your partner and the problem you're trying to solve as an object. Take, for example, the question of how much a company's equity is worth. In this case, you're not negotiating against the investor over a position, you're engaged with that person to arrive at the right answer to the question. Some will urge you to make your negotiation opponent a partner, but this can lead to Stockholm Syndrome. Instead just think of engaging the other person, using their input to arrive at the right ...