My Pregnancy



My Pregnancy

Introduction

Being pregnant is the most beautiful feeling that gives the second thought of being mother. It is the most magical, spiritual and mystical bond that exist between a mother and child (Victoria Magazine 2005,p.6). This is what the word pregnancy is associated with. The relation between a child and mother starts from the moment when a woman first realized the feeling of being having another life inside her. This is the most heavenly feelings that cannot be defined in words. All over the world mothers are always the most privileged especially the pregnant ones. There is a spiritual bond between a mother and child that gives strength to the woman by feeling that she is giving birth to another life. It is the reality of this relation that, this bond between mother and child starts before birth and extends after the death (Eason, 1999). This is the most perfect and unconditional relation yet it is bound by some strict conditions imposed on this relation. This same relation that could make a woman spiritual and heavenly figure can make her encountered with shame, disgust and humiliation (Arai,2009, p.47).

Discussion

It was a complete shock for me when I first came to realize that I am pregnant. I tried to deny myself that it cannot happen, but that was a fact that I was positive. 'Positive?', at eighteen, just a teenage, college going girl who lives with her parents, is pregnant. No, that is negative, totally negative and unacceptable. It was even unacceptable in law as illegal act (Checkland & Wong,2000, p. 103-104 ). That was what made me feel guilty when I first realized what has happened. I considered it a biggest mistake of my life. I had no idea what to do and whether I should tell my parents about this or not. It was not easy to reveal this to them. They love me and they cannot tolerate this. That made me become scared and I had a feeling of guilt and fear inside me. I lost my concentration in studies. I could not focus on anything and this resulted in my sickness and illness. My parents become concerned about my health and when they decided to take me to the doctor I tried very hard to avoid this, but my mother forcibly took me to the doctor and there it was like the whole world collapse in front of me when doctor told her about my pregnancy. That was the moment that I could not face my mother, but I could feel the pain and disappointment on her face. She did not ask me anything. I could not forget that day I was trying to explain this to her but I had no strength. That day my father returned home very early, he too was concerned about me and I had no idea what should I tell him or how to face him. My mother told him and he was quite I again felt the same feel ...