Fiction Writing

Assignment 1

Using the show, don't tell story writing method; revise this story using the show method.

The Bone Man knelt down, admiring the potential additions to his prized collection. In the sunlight that crept through the dense vegetation, he gently traced each of the seven neatly aligned rib bones with the tip of his finger. He leaned back and rubbed his fingertips together as if absorbing the droplets of blood. Methodically arranged by size on the forest floor, each bone belonged to a different victim and each bone was specifically chosen. Nothing was random for The Bone Man. He had taken his time choosing the best specimen from each lifeless body. His careful extraction mimicked movement's of a trained surgeon. Each bone lacked unnecessary cracks. The minimum cartilage and blood on each specimen was testament to his skill.

He reached into an aged leather bag and carefully pulled out a portable microscope. The stainless steel glistened in the dim light. The tool's condition was near perfect. Gently placed on his lap, The Bone Man picked up the first rib bone. After adjusting knobs jutting out at all angles, changing the bone's position ever so slightly and taking his time to find the right focus and magnification, he smiled. The smile did not leave his face till he examined the very last specimen. He felt relieved, satisfied. “These will surely please the overseers,” he thought to himself as he completed his job of legend. He continued his close examination. One by one, he peered long and hard through lenses at the larger specimens belonging to four adults. He spent an equal amount of time examining the bones of the three children. Often, he retracted from the rubber eye piece, stretched and then adjusted his seating for the best light. He sampled each specimen for bone marrow and set aside the specimen that pleased him most. Rising to his feet, he walked over to his bag and pulled out a neatly folded purple silk cloth. The Bone Man wrapped the children's' bones in silk and set out to find a respectable place for the children's bones. He found a young sapling and dug small hole at its base. Taking a knee, he closed his eyes. His lips moved as his lips moved to a prayer for the deceased angels, bowed his head in respect and buried the wrapped bones.

He took his time walking back to his camp site. The man often paused to glance at the aging trees and lush forest that served as the perfect setting to his discrete profession. His thoughts ran back to his research of the location. Disgusted by the endless wars fought for domination over the weak, he nodded in disapproval of the human race and couldn't help but wonder, “How much blood has settled into this dirt I so proudly walk across- the blood of innocent children, savage men, or tyrants? It is the blood of a race in decline.” The world had truly ...